Laughing Burns Calories Feb-2014

What deep thinkers men are… I mowed the lawn today, and after doing so I sat down and had a cold beer. The day was quite beautiful, and the drink facilitated some deep thinking. My wife walked by and asked me what I was doing and I said “nothing”. The reason I said that instead of saying “just thinking” was because she would have then said “about what”. And I would have had to explain that men are deep thinkers about various topics which would...

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Laughing Burns Calories (February 2013)

Laughing Burns Calories (February 2013)

Things I don’t understand   Yo Gabba Gabba   The whole vampire thing The need to adjust home lights or thermostat via the internet   In 1907, President Theodore Roosevelt signed an immigration act which excluded; idiots, imbeciles, feeble-minded persons, the insane, and others.  These days, we don’t need to inport them, we raise our own!  Overheard in the gym “My girlfriend thinks I’m a stalker. Well, she’s not...

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You May Be A Fitness Nut !

It’s true! You may be a Fitness Nut. That could be good, or bad, as there are various grades of Fitness Nuttiness. So, how do you know how serious your condition is?  Simple, take the “Fitness Nut” test. Provided here, for your entertainment. Instructions: Read the statements. Keep track of the statements that identify you. Add up your “Fitness Nut” points. Note that some statements count more points than others. When finished, tally your...

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Laughing Burns Calories (December 2012)

Laughing Burns Calories (December 2012)

Stand Clear – Idiots on Treadmill            A funny one from my grandson, age 5. Why did the hamburger go to the gym? To get better buns.             Overheard in the gym Every night my sleep is like a football game. Four quarters, broken up by trips to the men’s room.             Things I don’t understand: Justin Bieber Cup cakes People riding my bumper when I’m doing 10 over the limit Coffee makers that use...

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Laughing Burns Calories (October 2012)

What do you say when Jesus sneezes? The Mr. Universe Contest is rigged. All the contestants are from earth. Drink coffee. Do stupid things faster and with more energy. Overheard in the gym: Dear Mr. Romney, thank you for all the jobs you created for us. We really appreciate it. Signed: Juho Wang, Peoples Republic of China.   Remember that Jim Carey movie “Dumb and Dumber? This scene is even funnier when monkeys do it! Watch...

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Laughing Burns Calories (August 2012)

Laughing Burns Calories (August 2012)

. A good friend will come and bail you out, but a GREAT friend will be right there with you saying “damn, we screwed up!” . Okay… I joined the Navy to see the world. I saw it. How do I get out? . My 15 year old client was telling me about his X-Box and all the things that it can do. I told him that when I was young, I didn’t have an X-Box, I had a cigar box, and I used it to keep my marbles and baseball cards. .  ...

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A Challenge for those of us new to blogs

Okay new readers of Fitness Message – The Blog here is a challenge for you. Practice adding a comment to this article by answering the question below. There are no “wrong” answers. Be as serious or as funny as you like (funny is better). Here’s the question:   “What made you decide to get fit?” A few answers to get you started…..         A photo of me freaked me out         My doctor scared the heck out of me         I look like a...

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